Relationship Problems? & Minding Your Own Businesee

I believe that every single relationship on earth has the own problem. To me, relationship without problems just arent’s relationship at all. They are simply two person wanting something at the moment of time and ignore each other when they don’t need the other one. In other words, they just care what they want when they want it and they don’t care when they don’t want it. Nevertheless, there are people out there that would disagreewith me. What they agree is that relationship should be perfect, no quarrel and no fighting. Well, I have only a word for these kind of people, bullshit. Even life is full of problem, problems that needed to be solve, that’s the purpose of life. Relationship is part of one’s life, so it must have problems. Those people who couldn’t accept that relationship should have problem are simply ignorant. These ignorant simply don’t want to accept the facts and avoiding them as well as escaping the problem instead of dealing with it.

On the other hand, I want to talk about minding your own business. I have a story, about a pig in a farm. There was also a horse in the farm. One day, the horse fall sick and couldn’t stand up. So, the farmer called the vet to check on him. A series of test is done by the vet and it is found that the horse was infected with serious disease which is fatal. Antidote is being given to the horse and the vet told the farmer that he would come back tomorrow. Besides, he also told the farmer that if the horse couldn’t stand back up after three days, it must be put to sleep. The pig heard about this, and because he doesn’t want the horse to put to sleep, he wants to take things into his own matter to save the horse. What he did is that he ran to the farm where the horse is lying on and told him everything as well as pleeding him to stand up or else he will die. The second day, the vet came and checked on the horse again but found no changes or improvement. Again, the pig beg and pleaded very hard to the horse asking him to stand up to save his own life. Very hard the horse tried but he is too weak to stand up. On the third day, which is the day that the horse will put to sleep if the condition doesn’t improve. The vet came early and checked on the horse for the final time. After doing so, he walked to the farmer and tell him the bad news. The vet said that the horse must be put to sleep if not all the other animals in the farm will be infected. The pig who overheard the conversation rushed to the horse to tell him that they ate going to put him to sleep if he don’t stand up now, it’s now or never. The horse, gather all his strength and put it all on his legs and tried to stand up. He did it ! Finally! The farmer and the vet was very amazed by the miracle. To celebrate this, the pig is sacrificed as food in the party. So, I don’t need to tell you the value of this story, it’s very obvious. If you don’t see it, refer back to the first sentence of this paragraph, it’s the topic sentence.

Forgetting

It’s been almost a month now since I was back here in PJ. And from the last sem break, I found out that long distance relationship is harder to maintain than I thought it would be. First, final exam came and went and you finally get to go back and meet her. To me, it was very delight. When I was back in Penang, I spent so much of my time with her, so much that one day we can meet each other up to three or four times! We met so frequent until that my parents found out about her. It’s no more a secret right now. Time flies like no other days in that one month. In a blink of an eye, it was time again to come back. Being back for the first week, I found myself in the same condition as when I was here for the first time. The pain that I endured of missing her is too much to bear and to think of this would happen for every single semester did not make things any better.

However, things aren’t getting along lately. We have been arguing again, quite often. I don’t know why, but we seems to have forgotten our promise to each other before all this started from the beginning of my foundation course. As time goes by, slowly, bit by bit, we lost our detailed memories together and can only see each other’s flaws and cons. We started argue of who being wrong and who being right and ended up not speaking to each other. Nowadays, she has a bad habit that really getting my nerve. Whenever she is mad of me, she will switched off her phone so that I couldn’t reach her. I used to do that when I was fed up of her last time, long time ago but I never do it anymore. Maybe she forget the pain she felt when she is unable to reach me. Perhaps, this is the feeling she wants me to feel, hurting me purposely. She once told me that she love me like she never loved anyone before. I really trusted her and believe in what she is trying to convey to me. But on current situations, it is not true anymore. Nowadays, she would have the heart to leave me hurt like that, putting me aside, caring her own feelings. Back then, it was my feelings over her feelings in a sense that she would see me smile than herself smiling. Because once she see my smiles, she’ll smiles. I couldn’t stop telling myself that, maybe both of us had reach a no turning point, a situation that there is no going back, no reset button, no second chance would do and no starting all over again. Once again, she is not afraid of losing me...

Happening

Things happen every day. Almost a week before, the results of the final examination is out. At first glance of my results, I was really really happy and satisfied about it. However, when I look at it again and again. I ask myself why didn’t I do better although my results is better than most others. I was kind of disappointed that I didn’t get better results.

Things were much different for my elder brother. His results was out a few days back. It is his re-sit examination. He took the paper again because he failed it on the first attempt. Still, in this exam, he shows no improvement and still failed the subjects that he re-took. Dad and grandma was upset because of the outcome of his results. As for himself, it was just short-term. I don’t know how he manage it, but he make the thing looked uncomplicated and he didn’t care much about it. He treated it light and unimportant. The next day, he was as good as new, like nothing ever happen. For this aspect, I can say that it is both a good and bad thing. I wish I can feel like him when the time is bad for me. But I just couldn’t... And education is so so so important to me, so important that no one could understand how important it is to me.

As for my relationship, things are neither bad nor good. There are good times and there are bad times. Everyone of us enjoy good time more than bad times. Good times are like I brought her to see my parents. Bad times are like today... I love her, no matter what. Unfortunately for today, she talked a little bit too much that is getting my nerve. To be perfectly honest, it is very difficult to look into her face and tell her that she is very annoying. But I did it anyway, it just slipped out of my lips accidentally. Maybe my temper is at its point of no return.

In some moments, I just wanted peace and calm. Not too much talk but not too little as well. Why am I like this? It begun with my previous girlfriend. Before this, I was very talkative to my girlfriend and want to spent every second of my time with her. She was the other way round, the opposite of what I want. She wanted some time of herself and being leave alone sometimes. So, after she and I broke up, I changed. In my mind, women like mature guys who doesn’t talk much and spend his time separately after the date. Current girlfriend isn’t like so. If you get it, you get it... If you don’t never mind. In short, she is just like me before. In this situation, I just have no idea of what to do and how to do. So, what I would do is just leave it and just pretend nothing happen and look forward to the next day. It is because sometimes I feel that I couldn’t handle her in a manner way. Me myself is pretty sad now because there is only a few days left before I’ll head back to PJ and still here we are in a cold war. Does this means that she doesn’t appreciate the time left between us before we can meet again in the next 4 months. Anyway... .. .

Back to my study, in my second semester, I hope myself to be more hard working. Spend less time on shows and movies and more of my time on report, assignment, revision and practice. In other words, I’ll try to do better than I did in my first semester and perhaps score better.

Happening

Things happen every day. Almost a week before, the results of the final examination is out. At first glance of my results, I was really really happy and satisfied about it. However, when I look at it again and again. I ask myself why didn’t I do better although my results is better than most others. I was kind of disappointed that I didn’t get better results.

Things were much different for my elder brother. His results was out a few days back. It is his re-sit examination. He took the paper again because he failed it on the first attempt. Still, in this exam, he shows no improvement and still failed the subjects that he re-took. Dad and grandma was upset because of the outcome of his results. As for himself, it was just short-term. I don’t know how he manage it, but he make the thing looked uncomplicated and he didn’t care much about it. He treated it light and unimportant. The next day, he was as good as new, like nothing ever happen. For this aspect, I can say that it is both a good and bad thing. I wish I can feel like him when the time is bad for me. But I just couldn’t... And education is so so so important to me, so important that no one could understand how important it is to me.

As for my relationship, things are neither bad nor good. There are good times and there are bad times. Everyone of us enjoy good time more than bad times. Good times are like I brought her to see my parents. Bad times are like today... I love her, no matter what. Unfortunately for today, she talked a little bit too much that is getting my nerve. To be perfectly honest, it is very difficult to look into her face and tell her that she is very annoying. But I did it anyway, it just slipped out of my lips accidentally. Maybe my temper is at its point of no return.

In some moments, I just wanted peace and calm. Not too much talk but not too little as well. Why am I like this? It begun with my previous girlfriend. Before this, I was very talkative to my girlfriend and want to spent every second of my time with her. She was the other way round, the opposite of what I want. She wanted some time of herself and being leave alone sometimes. So, after she and I broke up, I changed. In my mind, women like mature guys who doesn’t talk much and spend his time separately after the date. Current girlfriend isn’t like so. If you get it, you get it... If you don’t never mind. In short, she is just like me before. In this situation, I just have no idea of what to do and how to do. So, what I would do is just leave it and just pretend nothing happen and look forward to the next day. It is because sometimes I feel that I couldn’t handle her in a manner way. Me myself is pretty sad now because there is only a few days left before I’ll head back to PJ and still here we are in a cold war. Does this means that she doesn’t appreciate the time left between us before we can meet again in the next 4 months. Anyway... .. .

Back to my study, in my second semester, I hope myself to be more hard working. Spend less time on shows and movies and more of my time on report, assignment, revision and practice. In other words, I’ll try to do better than I did in my first semester and perhaps score better.

Being back ...

It’s a Thursday today... Morning, I woke up early at 7.15am. I had to wake up so early because I have to go to JPN office to renew my IC. I left the house at around 7.30 am. Other things beside renewing my IC this morning was to fetch my girl to school. However, her class starts at 10 am, so she had to follow me to the JPN office.

I reached the office there before 8 am which is the time it should have open already. To my relief, the office opened before eight and there were people who arrived even earlier. I got the number from the counter and it’s number twelve. Not bad... But for the first half an hour, progress was really really slow. Only after that it seems reasonable. But still it would still take another half an hour or so to be my turn. It turn out to be not like that. Because when the number reach 9. An old lady come to me and asked me what number am I. I told her twelve. She wanted to exchange the number with me and I can see that she is holding the number 9. We exchanged and I went to the counter to process my renewal. It took about 5-8 minutes to scan both of my thumb print and then take a picture of me. I paid ten ringgit for the renewal. I guess this is how the government makes money. LOL. After everything was completed, I was told that it’ll be done in a month’s time, and I’ll need to collect it only after a month in which I will not be able to as I am going to go back to PJ at the 15^th of next month.

After that, she and I went to the McDonald’s at Greenlane’s... I missed the breakfast so much and I ordered two sets of it. I love the Sausage McMuffin especially. It’s still early and we have a lot of time before it reaches ten o’clock. So, we sat there and chatted for some time. I was surprised to see that the seats are not full. In fact, there wasn’t enough customer in it to even occupied half of the seats available. I mean, this McDonald’s outlet especially is opened 24 hours per day and 7 days per week and is located at the most commonly used road in Penang. It’s around 9am-10am, so maybe it can be excused because everybody is either going to work or school or anything of their concern.

Since I was back, I had accompanied my girlfriend for quite some time already. I hope that she doesn’t feel being avoided or being ignored even I am back now. Maybe because of this, she is somehow pampered. Today, morning, after the breakfast, I wanted to fetch her to her college but she reluctantly refused to go to school. She insisted that today’s class is useless and it’s pointless that she attend them. My opinion, class are important regardless of their usefulness. We attend class even if it is useless because of discipline matter. If we allow ourselves to skip class so often, it will eventually become a habit. This habit will follow us into our working days and so on. After 20 minutes of argument and pleading of so, she agreed to go to school. Later, I went home and continue my sleep with my girl dog, Viki... LOL...

I had my lunch at grandma’s and went home. Till now, I had somehow completed the first chapter of chemistry of semester 2. It’s not hard, but I just want to get everything into place and prepare myself for the next semester. So, because I already did my study, I planned to watch a few movies in the evening. After all, dad bought new Blu-ray Disc which I can enjoy in his home theatre which may cost more than 50k... The Blu-ray disc itself cost 150 ringgit. OMG... Nevertheless, at least I can enjoy Full HD ^^ So, what I watched is the third movie of UNDERWORLD: The Rise of The Lycans. The story is not bad. But most of the settings are during the night. So, most of the scenes are quite dark. The length of the movie isn’t so long either. I think maybe roughly one and an half of hour. Seems early, so I proceed with the next movie. I didn’t concentrate much on this movie because I was online and busy with my Facebook and checking my mails. However, even without my concentration, I can really tell that it is a nice movie. It’s a true story that is about the assassination of Hitler. You know, watching a movie will increase not only one’s language but also one’s knowledge. Because while watching this show, I learned that Hitler has a brother called Himmler.

Elder brother is going to work starting this Saturday and I am assigned to fetch him to work and back from work, lol... At least, after I dropped him at work, then I can have the car on my own for the rest of the day.

Coming back to Penang give me a feeling that is hard to explain. I can’t say that I am not glad to be back. Being back give me a sense of easiness. However, my freedom had been removed from me. Daily, I have to go down to grandma’s for meal and so on. But then I get to spend time with my dog, watch movie with my dad’s big plasma... and so on ... .. . But still I prefer to be in PJ, or perhaps not so fast... Because I miss the food here !!!!

One week's EXAM !!!

It’s 1852 hour now, Saturday... It’s raining on and off here in Kuala Lumpur. I’m now at waiting to board my bus back to Penang at Kuala Lumpur station. It’s still early, so I think I’ll write something while waiting. I have been off for quite some time ass lately I was busy for my examination. But it’s over now, the test is over. Well, to be accurate, it just over. My last test was Math, which I was not doing well on it. But I did not give up on it. Last night, I was so tired after sitting for my Computer Studies paper. The paper went well, I know how to answer pretty much all of the question. Some of them are from past year question which I did went through the previous night. But then, still, there are a few question that I don’t know how to answer. Nevertheless, I tried to answer it in a reasonable answer hoping that it would gain me some marks better than nothing.

As for today’s paper, I honestly thought it would be a disaster for me. However, I think my hard work pay off which I started since weeks before the examination started. Same like the Computer Studies, I know how to answer most of the question. But still, nothing is perfect, so I had a few question in which I am not sure about my solution. However, it would still guarantee me an A for math, which is more than I could hope for based on my performance. I am quite delighted to say this. Because math is my worst nightmare. It’s the subject that would drag me down on my CGPA. I am aiming for 4.0, but 3.9 would also be fine for me. And in order to get 4.0, I need to get A for all my subjects. And to achieve 3.9, I would need to get at least 4 A’s and maximum of 2 A-‘s ... .. . Ok now, the rest of the subject.

The first paper of the examination was Physics in last Saturday. In this paper, I was very very confidence indeed. It’s very I can perform very well. But then the paper was harder than I thought it would be. Was shocked shockingly !!! Luckily I perform well in my coursework thus I can afford to lose more marks in this final exam. Although it doesn’t went well on the first subject. I still manage complete it one piece. Should be an A, hope so, if the other question has no careless mistake on it.

No paper on Sunday, so I was busy preparing for the next paper. Monday was English test and Tuesday was Chemistry test. I didn’t thought that there is anything I could revise on my English. Therefore, I concentrated my revision on my chemistry. So, on Monday, the English test went ok, it’s neither easy nor hard and I completed it in just an hour. I used another half an hour to check on it and then I left the exam hall. So, when I left the hall, what I did was to revise on my Principles of Economics which is on Wednesday instead of Chemistry which is on the next day. I had a lot of confidence in my Chemistry more than in my Physics.

On the next day, the Chemistry, well, I can only say one thing, which is, I am so happy for it. Only a minor question that I don’t know how to do. Ok, nothing much for this, so let’s move to Wednesday. Okay, Principle of Economics. Well, I can’t say that I am very good at this because I am still new to it. However, I did work hard on this subject lately and I score 4.8 out of 5 marks in my quiz, highest in my group, which based on my friend’s calculation is one incorrect out of 30 questions. This gave me a bit of confidence. The examination itself wasn’t very hard and they have questions which are something similar to past year question. It’s EASY !!!!

Something pretty funny happened today during exam. I went into the wrong  room ! So 15 minutes through the exam, I had to change room. ^^  THAT’S ALL

Giving Up? Maybe not...

It’s 20 minutes to 2 o’clock in the afternoon now. Waiting for the next class to start… Everybody is busying their own things. Students from the other class are having fun taking pictures together. My class, half of it is missing. Because they are skipping the class as the lecture is not teaching and there will only presentation throughout the class. That’s why they left. Another group of students were quarantine because one of the students in the group was infected with H1N1 virus. So, they will be missing for a week. Unfortunately… Well, due to this, more than half of the class is missing. I guess the lecturer is going to be mad. Nevertheless, some of the students were a bit upset about their marks for physics test 2. Some had gain as some had degrade in marks. I had gain, that’s the most important thing that I care for. Lately, I had found that we can’t compare ourselves with other. Let says, last time, my marks is lower than his. And then, this time around, my marks is higher than him. This doesn’t mean that I have improved, no. Now, I want to change my thinking. To improve is to get a higher marks than my previous marks for the same subjects over the same total marks regardless of the different in difficulty. That is what is improving. To compare to yourself is better than comparing to any other people in this world. Once you keep improving, one day, you will triumph everyone in this world. My math is not good, and my grade is going down and down from one chapter to another. God present an opportunity for me to change that fact. The math test is the last test in the final exam. It means I have a longer period of preparing for it. For people who did not do well in the physics exam, I understand the feeling of beaten, it was how I felt for my math. Don’t give up just because you don’t understand the subject, don’t hate the subject because it’s hard. Take it on as a challenge. As something meant impossible but make it possible. Love it because it’s something that you don’t know. Love it as something that you can learn new things discover new knowledge. That way, no matter what, you can do it. Another thing I want to specified, knowledge is not limited. When human studies everything that we had ever known, we try to discover new things, new knowledge. It’s human nature. So, don’t plan to stop studying. If you think so, then there’s only one word to describe you, “lazy”. Education is endless. There is saying in Chinese, it means you learn as you age.